This is for all the Ulysses nerds out there.
- I made this. I wrote all the stories, compiled all the images, and conducted the layout all by myself without breaking a computer or anything.
- This was my final.
- I am proud of it.
My baby computer is back from my local PeachMac with a brand new battery and that means my technological issues are now sailing smoothly. No pages have frozen and there have been no random shutdowns. I really like this new battery. I really like my computer. I really like having a fully functional computer again, especially because my new battery was completely free (thanks, Apple Care). In honor of my baby computer’s recovery, I’ve decided to keep things very positive and elaborate on some things I really like.
This might as well be a peek into my soul.
1) Lomographic film
It’s a little pricey, but I think it’s completely worth it. Well, film is usually a little pricey. Let’s just say it costs more than Kodak. The film comes in a variety of speeds and even comes in 120 mm.
I have a few rolls on me, but I’m saving them for Austria. If I’m going to use film over there, I might as well try to make the pictures look as beautiful as the actual place will be.
Look at the colors! And I used a shitty scanner.
Whenever I have these, I conserve them because they smell so good and I think it’s kind of ridiculous to spend $6.50 on a packet of 30 makeup-removing wipes every week or two when I can just use water and toilet paper (I don’t wear much makeup, so I can get away with that.)
These towelettes really do the job, though. That’s why I save them. I need them for the nights I actually decide to wear a lot of makeup (by a lot of makeup, I mean mascara – hey, it’s a bitch to remove).
Plus they have white tea in them so they smell amazing and feel nice and cold. Perhaps the temperature of the wipes has nothing to do with the tea, but I like to think it does.
When I was little, I didn’t think I would ever wear lipstick because the kind my mom wore smelled weird and chalky. Within the last few years, however, I’ve really grown to love lipstick because despite its appearance, it’s actually pretty low-maintenance, which is perfect for somebody who doesn’t like to put a huge effort into her appearance when it comes to makeup (me). Lipstick is so classy and womanly and people never really think about how it only takes about ten seconds to put it on.
4) Word Warp
A few years ago, my mom bought me a puzzle book from Starbucks that was decked out with cartoony illustrations of birds and bugs and several different types of word games. That book is what first got me hooked on the anagram. I filled the puzzles out quickly, and have been searching for a replica of the anagrams I solved in that book ever since. The closest I have come to that is Word Warp.
The objective is pretty simple: a number of letters is provided, and you have to form as many words as you possibly can from them. There is a time limit, but you can get rid of that in the settings. And for a logophile, it is extremely addicting.
7) Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide
The spectrum of characters in Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide is fantastic. Immaculate, even. There’s Cookie, who’s half-boy, half-cyborg. And Lisa Zemo, the girl who suffers extreme allergies but then gets on new allergy meds in the third season and becomes insanely hot. And Vice Principal Krubbs, who only wears white suits, is obsessed with flamingoes, and decided to become a vice principal after quitting his job as a vice cop because the profession still had the word “vice” in it. And Dr. Xavier, the 8th grade math teacher with a thick Russian accent who makes her students wear “math smocks” and preaches her very own aphorism, “without math, we are cavemen eating mud.” And Gordy, the janitor who is constantly outsmarted by a weasel that lives inside the school. And don’t you even think that I forgot about Coconut Head.
This is, undisputedly, the greatest show ever. I only wish my middle school experience could have been similar.
I will now bid you farewell using Coconut Head’s visage.